This summer I had the opportunity to go to the Conférence Annuelle des Jeunes Adultes Francophones in Bordeaux. Not only was it was a wonderful experience culturally and spiritually, but I know my French improved so much over those short five days.
Culturally, it was one of the few and precious moments when I was among virtually all French speakers (There were 3 Americans there, out of around 360 JA, or Young Adults.) and didn't feel like an observor or English teacher or tourist. I was one of them, and was treated as such. I think it's hard for people to make solid friendships with someone they know is leaving soon, and I think there are a lot of Americans who pass in and out of France, spend maybe a semester and then leave, so they are never really integrated into the ward or stake like someone who would premanently live there. That's how I felt at first; I was in a lot of ways the outsider. I required a lot of patience to carry on a conversation, usually didn't understand slang or any form of humor. However it's been a year since I joined the JA in the stake of Angers, and I think the barriers are finally gone. One night, the 4 other girls in my tent sat on my bed and we stayed up until 3am, talking and joking, and I realized, even exhausted in the middle of the night, that I understood about 80% of the conversation. Occationally they would stop and explain something, a reference to a film or tv add that I wouldn't understand, but I could follow and actually contribute to the conversation like one of them. They weren't watering it down; they certainly weren't speaking slowly and articulation. It was one of those few milestones I've had where I could see how far I've come.
I feel that I have a much better understanding of the way the church functions throughout France and Europe. For the last night, the spiritual night, two of the three talks given were about marriage. I had noticed a huge emphasis on marriage throughout the whole week, which is normal for a young single adult conference. However what wasn't normal was that a very small percent of the guys had served missions. And yet there wasn't much emphasis placed on the imprtance of going on a mission, from what I could tell. I talked to a friend about this, Estelle from Lyon, and she explained to me that missions in France are much more difficult to organize than missions in the US. A student usually can't take a break in his studies for two years and then expect to get back into school and continue. So consequently, the boys finish school and serve missions at maybe 22 or 23 years old, rather than the more traditional age of 19. So if the boys aren't serving missions until they're older, and the girls want to marry a returned missionaries, then obviously the girls aren't getting married either. At least not until they are much older than the average LDS marriage in the US. Therefor, people are single much longer and are attending YSA conference many more times, and the average age is much older. At almost 22 years old, I would be considered one of the older people at a YSA conference in the states. However at this francophone conference, I had people often tell me that I am young, and I met lots of people aged 25 to 30.
I will never really know for sure why so much emphasis was placed on marriage rather that serving a full time mission. However if I had to guess, I would say the Church is choosing its battles here. Although a mission is a wonderful thing for all young men in the church, nothing is more important than a temple marriage. The church is young in France and although the members are strong, they are scattered across large distances and are relatively few in number. Those who serve missions will have added blessings and strength and knowledge that will fortify their families, but the most important thing is that the family is founded on a solid, gospel foundation of Jesus Christ.
The CAJAF was truly a once in a lifetime opportunity for me. The lessons, games, activities, sandy beach between a lake and the ocean near Bordeaux, windsurfing, tents, and the friendships I made and strengthened at CAJAF have given me memoreies that are surely among my most precious of all that I have experienced here in France.
No comments:
Post a Comment